A Volga Update (it is not about the river)

Gareths bike out of the blue developed a starting problem in Samarkhand and an earlier blog refers, so now an update.

The fix involved Dave and I scouring the Samarkhand auto bazzar for a suitable part we found the perfect solution an ignition switch from a Volga salon which also incorporated a very substantial solenoid. It has now been functioning well for nearly two weeks how ever Dave and I found when doing the final checks on our installation the start sequence was critical.

The Start sequence is; first disarm the bike alarm, then turn bike ignition switch on, then deactivate the bike kill switch, then lift bike side stand , then ensure that the bike is in neutral and finally reach down to ones nether regions to where we have mounted the Volga switch and turn vigorously. Now reader I think I can read your minds and yes the crowds that gather are mystified with the activity in Gareth’s nether regions. After some fast cranking the bike usually bursts into life, that is except if Gareth in his weakened state (afficted with Extreme Purging Squirts) has remembered all the steps needed to get the bike started, if it isnt done in the above sequence it will not start. He has also managed to scatter the assembled throng a number of times when the critical part of the start sequence that of ensuring the bike is in neutral is forgotten , what happens then is when Gareth activates the Volga switch an action that requires both hands the bike lurches forward scattering the crowd and ofcourse completly out of control as there are now no hands on the handle bars!! The crowds roar their approval of this performance with clapping and peels of laughter. Gareth meanwhile wrestles the bike under control selects neutral ( not an easy task as one of the side effects of the failed solenoid is the neutral light is on all the time !!) wrestles with the switch the engine bursts into life once again with loud approval of the crowd and he is on his way muttering loudly” I must remember to put the bike in neutral”” I must remember to put the bike in neutral”

Not sure BMW will pick up this mod but we think it will get us to Beijing. But I think you will all agree it is a Volga solution in more ways than one!!

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